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Dating A Cougar 101

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The Joy Of Dating An Older Woman

According to SingleBlackMale.org, older women who date younger men, affectionately known as “cougars” in most social circles, are awesome. There are a number of reasons not limited to the fact that many studies have shown they actually have higher sex drives than their younger counterparts. You don’t believe me? Here’s a quote from a TIME article on the subject:

Women ages 27 through 45 report not only having more sexual fantasies (and more intense sexual fantasies) than women ages 18 through 26 but also having more sex, period. And they are more willing than younger women to have casual sex, even one-night stands. In other words, despite the girls-gone-wild image of promiscuous college women, it is women in their middle years who are America’s most sexually industrious. – Source: TIME

A cougar is an older woman who enjoys dating younger men, and this coupling has seemingly become more popular in recent years. Although it’s always been done, it wasn’t as socially accepted as older men dating younger women. But with Hollywood couples like Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher and the hit TV show “Cougar Town,” cougars seem to be growing in numbers and are on the prowl.

Why would any man want to date an older woman? Well, older women are not only more mature, and financially independent, but they’re also better lovers and usually won’t mess with your head. These are just some of the positive aspects of dating an older woman.

I am suggesting a reversal of the standard. It’s time that men start realizing the benefits of dating older women. In general, we always complain that women don’t know what they want and that they’re high maintenance. Well why not change the standard and date women that can appreciate real men that are givers instead of takers.

Good Things About Cougars

  • Experienced: Older women may not be as toned as they once were and they might not be quite as perky in the various spots they’re supposed to be perky in, but it’s amazing what an extra ten years of experience can teach you. They don’t beat around the bush (they let you do that). They know exactly what they want and they will manipulate you physically and mentally to get it.
  • Independence: Older women are more established in their careers and rely less on a man to support them or a potential future family. An older woman’s independence is a strong stress reliever for any man. A man does not have to worry about dating young gold diggers that will take him for a ride only to get a slice of his wallet. This takes away some of the pressure from a man’s shoulder to support the relationship (i.e. you won’t go broke).A word of caution, this point does not apply to all older women. A young gold digger will eventually become an old gold digger, so keep your eyes open. At an older age, a woman should have the ability to pay for her own things (i.e. furniture, clothing, cell phone, etc).
  • Maturity: Older women know how to appreciate the truer things in life. They don’t play head games and don’t value the materialistic ideals that are pushed through the media channels. You can have a deep conversation with an older woman, and not have to worry about going into stupid topics such as how her hair follicle no. 490 was out of place, or how the pink lipstick did not match perfectly with her purple mini skirt. You also don’t have to worry about returning her home before midnight to meet a curfew.The benefit of older women is especially apparent on vacations. Young women have the annoying habit of wanting to always wanting to do something. They say silly things like, “We paid all this money to be here, we should make the most of it.” This is a phrase that no man in his right mind ever wants to hear. A man goes on vacation to drink over-priced beer while sitting in a Jacuzzi contemplating what to order next at the all-you-can-eat restaurant.
  • Dating advice: Many women are offended by the word Cougar but it can be a good thing ladies. Don’t knock it till you try it. There are many benefits to dating…

Read more …

Bad Things About Dating Cougars

  • Commitment and Biological Clocks: There’s nothing wrong with a May/September relationship because a woman has as much right as a man to like someone younger. To find that perfect older woman, you might have to consider her plans to start a family. Remember, her biological clock is pounding real fast. Since she wants to date a young man, however, there might be a chance that she just wants to have fun with an energetic man without having to worry about having babies. So before jumping into a relationship, find out if she’s looking to have kids right away.
  • Older women know how to appreciate the truer things in life. They don’t play head games and don’t value the materialistic ideals that are pushed through the media channels. You can have a deep conversation with an older woman, and not have to worry about going into stupid topics such as how her hair follicle no. 490 was out of place, or how the pink lipstick did not match perfectly with her purple mini skirt. You also don’t have to worry about returning her home before midnight to meet a curfew.
  • The benefit of older women is especially apparent on vacations. Young women have the annoying habit of wanting to always wanting to do something. They say silly things like, “We paid all this money to be here, we should make the most of it.” This is a phrase that no man in his right mind ever wants to hear. A man goes on vacation to drink over-priced beer while sitting in a Jacuzzi contemplating what to order next at the all-you-can-eat restaurant.
  • Past Baggage: Along with those great years of sexual experience, some unresolved issues and excess baggage come attached to the package. You might want to consider doing a credit personality check to make sure she has no femme fatale history.

Well, I hope my little rant has helped open some minds, but most likely if you’re a man, you probably weren’t listening, and if you’re a woman, you already know I’m full of rubbish.

I encourage most men to give this whole idea a second thought, I bet you’ll save yourself a lot of headaches. If you’re a younger man looking to date an older woman, all you need is to follow a few tips to catch your cougar.

  1. Older women typically are not into the club scene where the music is so loud you have to shout to hear each other. Find upscale bars that draw a mature crowd. Wine bars, martini bars and cocktails lounges are a few suggestions.
  2. Another suggestion are places that young, single men hang out. Cougars on the prowl know where to find the younger men, so if you go to a sports bar and see a couple of older women pretending to be interested in the games, they might be looking for cubs.
  3. Go online. With so many people opting to use online dating as a way to meet people, you can be sure there are many sites catering to the older woman/younger man coupling. As with any dating website, you want to find the sites that best fit what you’re looking for. Know what you want. There are divorced cougars, cougars with children, cougars just looking for something casual and some who want relationships. It would be a good idea to know what you want before starting your cougar hunt.
  4. Be confident. No matter what age a man is, women like confidence. If you’re intention is to find a cougar, you have to project an image of self-assurance. Many older women have the confidence that a younger woman hasn’t developed yet because of her life experiences. You have to be able to match that by letting her know that you can handle anything that comes with dating a cougar. Be energetic. Many women date younger men because they have more energy than men their own age. If you exude a lust for life and a spontaneous attitude, this will attract a cougar.
  5. Approach an older woman. There’s no better way to find a cougar than to demonstrate your ability to strike up a conversation. This shows confidence and maturity. Be knowledgeable about things that an older woman is interested in. For example, if music is a topic of conversation, don’t just talk about music that’s current. Know something about the music that was popular when she was your age.

A helpful guide for finding and dating a cougar! The Tao of Badass. Find out how to step your game up with these simple instructions after the jump!

Tips@jazzyvadney

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About Darlene Dancy

Darlene Dancy is the owner of Affordable and Historical Art. Darlene's goal is to educate, motivate and empower people of African descent to learn the rich history of African culture - past & present. Discover Black History written, researched and preserved by African American Scholars. Lectures, Documentaries & Auto Biographies on DVD's and Historical Black Print/Poster art

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